Cyber harassment study reveals the unsurprising!
It still amazes me that I talk to guys who still think they get harassed just as much as women online. Like even from people who aren’t clearly and totally gross dumbasses. It kinda makes me think that, even in the best cases, it might be hard to really understand the sheer difference in frequency. You see a woman get harassed on a game and you go “Oh well I’ve been harassed” without understanding that there is seldom a session for her where that doesn’t happen or understanding what her inbox might look like…
That is a sort of stunning degree of difference.
"The data’s in! Women were lying about online harassment!”
"Aha! We knew it!"
“Yeah, they’ve been severely underreporting how bad things are for them, turns out.”
This reminds me of my school’s grad-night party. It had been a delightful mash of karting, eating, and dancing- a warm attempt to prevent us from drinking ourselves dead after four years of high school. At out final venue, part of the entertainment was a hypnotist’s act. He gathered our attention, chose some volunteers, and entranced us into silence. He was absolutely brilliant. Our classmates were clearly under his thrall, shivering when he told them too, watching as their noses stretched and snapped as the world he described to them became real. It was fascinating, until he told all of the ladies on stage,
"the guy sitting next to you has pinched your butt".
The idea was for them to get mad, to lash out at their attackers and give them a piece of their minds, only to confuse the poor boys. Because, you know, making someone think they’ve been assaulted is HILARIOUS. The men, on the other hand, were told that these women were slapping them for something they didn’t do. Again, assault, but the joke coming from how RIDICULOUS it is when women get angry,
The worst part is? Most of the girls refused to get mad. In their subconscious state, they were obviously scared and hurt, but brushed it away by insisting that “it was nothing”. Rape culture was staring us down in the faces, and we were supposed to laugh.
The BEST thing was that one woman homed in on the fact that the perpetrator of this assault was the hypnotist himself, and her refusal to bear his bullshit inspired the entirety of our class. Maybe next time he’ll think twice.